Dear Mr mischief
This is Alan Johnston, BBC reporter and recently released hostage of the Army of Islam. I beg you to shave your moustache of as the Army of Islam have threatened to re-capture and behead me unless you and Mr Wilkinson Sword start seeing eye to eye. Shave the thing off fucko.
Best wishes
Alan
Just spent the evening throwing shit away with Dade as I head to the airport in an hour to fly home and for some reason, despite being sure I'd thrown everything away, I saw a razor sat there on the shelf.
I took this to mean that the Army of Islam are watching me and planted it there as a subtle hint. Some guy is probably across the way with a high powered rifle aimed right at Mr Moustache as I type. Combined with being called a fucko by Alan Johnston I finally gave in.
Mr Moustache is gone.
No really.
Honestly.
Oh believe whatever you like!
