Alright bitches, looks like it's time to get back to the funnies again. Gettin back to my beloved London town has made me go all mushy and sentimental and from readin my last couple of posts I figured that you lot would make out I was goin soft.
The hottest dog on the block is back in town
The bitches flock round to see him don his crown
The king of the castle in his council flat
The bitches roll round the floor on their back
"Hey Andy come on over, give me a scratch
Feel my chest Dogter, havin a heart attack
Come on big boy fall into my trap
I'll be your dog and I'll sit on your lap"
"Hey baby" I say "you tryna lead me on?"
She flashes me a slice of her thong
"Baby I think you've got me all wrong
You don't look like you can last all night long
Turn the fuck around and get your clothes on
Take this fuckin john right offa my shlong
It will take more than a slut to turn on King Kong
Real class operatics not karaoke sing song"
There goes the bone again a ding dong
Peter my cousin who's goin to Hong Kong
China for breakfast in a week of dim sum
Thailand right after to get some cheap bum
Week off work see my dogs from home
The Kennel Club is how they are known
Down the pub or on the dog and bone
All of em are bitches when they're in the zone
So come on around to my fuckin house
Get down on all fours and smell my arse
I wag my tail and wave it up high
I cock my leg and I piss in your eye
So welcome back to the king of the shelter
Down from the sky on my helter skelter
This year I promise gonna be a belter
Signin off, The Mischief Maker
Andy 2002
Quote of 2002:
"The problem with the French is they have no word for Entrepreneur" - George Bush (Who else!)
