mischief mailart: December 2007

Looks like I was doomed from a young age...

All the warning signs were there, we just chose to ignore them...

Fish, cock, sandwich

Last night I had this great idea.

For some reason, I decided that scanning every single photo ever taken of my family was a worthwhile and productive way to spend the remains of my Christmas holiday, so I dug up all the photos and my trusty scanner (with which I scanned the entire science department in Kuwait out of sheer boredom 2 years ago) and got started.

As I was uploading the lot to my Picasa gallery I couldn't help noticing that all the pictures ever posted up on this blog were there in a folder entitled 'mischief', which makes sense as blogger and picasa are both owned by google.

Browsing through the pics, I noticed that I have this classic one of a tin of crap

...one of >>>cock<<< (Remember our 'little' friend Magnum Burhan....?

(I know you love that stuff H)

...and many occurrences of strange bread and bimbos.

and it occurred to me that in the new year I just HAD to make the funniest sandwich ever made! I can see it now....

A piece of crap, sprinkled with cock and stuffed in between two bits of fresh bimbo.

Marvellous.

Shit. Head.

A while back you may recall I was overjoyed to find that there was the possibility of getting turd thrown at me in Spain. Initially I had thought that this sort of thing only happened in the third world, like when I was in Delhi a few years back, but I never suspected that the shit would hit me in quite the way it did last weekend in Barcelona.

I've just bought me a new camera recently, a Canon 20D, and a bargain telephoto lens and so, walking around Parque Guell, Gaudi's famous town when I saw this pigeon parked astride a tower.

Now normally I wouldn't take a shot of a pigeon on a tower, but seeing as I have a new snazzy camera, I felt obliged to take a shot like this.

So I started focussing up with the totally manual generic lens, getting really into it when suddenly I felt this *slop* on my head.

Looking up in the air I got a little confused when I saw that there were no birds around, then suddenly out of nowhere these two 'helpful' Mexicans came along armed with tissues and started patting me down!

With a 400 Euro phone in one pocket, a £135 point and shot camera and a 500 Euro camera in my hand, all coupled with slitty eyes and a confused look I must have looked every bit the Japanese tourist and they must have thought Christmas had come a few weeks early as they attempted to rummage through my trousers.

Luckily though, I was onto their cunning scheme and allowed them to wipe off the 'birdshit' while I put my hands firmly in my pockets.

After they had left I did notice the that 'birdshit' on my head did smell strangely similar to guacamole.

It didn't taste too bad either.