Girl from across the street

I think I'm in love but you don't care
I blow you kisses but you're unaware
You're on my mind all night and day
When I get too close you push me away

This I know is my destiny
I live on the fringe of society
I've chosen this life of sobriety
Perhaps rarely alone but always lonely

I can't say really that I'm too surprised
The nicest girls go for the baddest guys
The baddest girls really just aint that nice
The nicest guys frozen hearts turn to ice

So welcome all to the story of my life
A typical tale of a guy who's nice
Told with the tears of a clown in my eyes
We're made for each other when will you realise!?!

But I expect I know where this will end
I'll be crying in the moonlight and singin this song
You'll be tellin me we can still be friends
cos someone better will have come along

Andy 2003

Giraffes

I heard this interview with this rapper on John Peel a few months back. He had just played this fantastic rap tune, about giraffes I think, by this guy which was absolutely hilarious and a damn fine tune too and at the end he says to him, "I hear you entered this into a rap competition in LA. Did you win?" to which the reply was, "I ended up narrowly missing out to this guy who rapped about the size of his cock"

I've never heard anything that sums up my life with such accuracy...

The 50 Letter challenge

Met up with quite a few people this weekend and a quick shout to all you bitches before I begin.

Having lost the bet with C++, who now has a job at a cocksucking company, training to be a cocksuckee, I decided a new challenge was in order and Taz has given me the next task.

Given that I spent 3 years and the better portion of 15 grand on 7 letters namely BSc (Hons) I was slightly shocked to hear that now I can actually pick up a further 7 letters for a bargain basement 10 quid from the Institute of Physics which gets me the letters AMInstP after my name. Strangely if you are a PhD you can apply for less letters after your name getting a full MInstP or FInstP but you have to pay up to £93!!! Less for more?!? A strange phenomenon indeed...

Working on the logic that now I can actually just sod doing any work and get letters for cash I decided to go hunting for letters which require little or no effort on my part. Given last years 10 qualifications or above challenge, me and Taz decided that the logical progression for this year should be to try and get 50 letters surrounding my name by the time I graduate.

Yes 50.

By the end of the year if all goes to plan the name already looks something like this...

Andytgeezer BSc (Hons), AMinstP, PGCE (NQT)

That's 21 letters so nearly halfway there already. M, what did you do to get Rev before your name again? Didn't you mention getting a qualification for doctor of religion on the web? Where and how?

Since laying this challenge down I have realised that it's actually a whole lot harder than I thought. For example the Institute of Biology require you to prove that you have contributed significantly to biology. The British Computer Society needs me to do a little more than prove I can use a computer.

And last time I looked you couldn't put the letters NVQ or A-level after your name. Watch this space....

Mischief