Today was very definitely a day for being gay. In fact it was such a good day for being gay, that my To Do list consisted of only one thing this morning which was "Be gay" which (reluctantly) got ticked off at the end of the day.
Strictly speaking I should not have been allowed to tick that task off as complete as I did not indulge in any brown love or for that matter anything more gay than thinking gay thoughts (I am a bender, I am a bender, I am a bender) all day and wearing flamboyant clothes.
I failed to use moisturiser, perform oral sex on another man, waer Muji flip flops (even though I own a pair) or go to Old Compton Street (which incidentally I done the other day with Tim. In fact we went to G-A-Y for a drink like a pair of undercover straight people)
In fact I failed miserably to be gay today so badly that I didn't even see the Gay Pride march or the after party, Pride in the Park in Hyde Park, despite being in the bloody park across the lake and hearing a lot of it.
Yes, it's time to come out.
I'm not really gay. I'm so sorry. I've been a really crappy faggot today and for the rest of my life. No matter how hard I tried I just couldn't fancy men. I think there must be something wrong with me. Everyone else I saw today seemed to have no problem fancying men. I think I'm going to have to face it that I am actually straight and unless I start pulling girls soon I will never get laid, cos I can't even use the bisexual fallback so favoured by my semi-bisexual cousin.
Personals
Taz - My hero. Two girls in two0way tonguefest. Well you're certainly not gay
Bags - Money for nothin ill-boy! Good to know my taxes are going to a good cause
